Some years stand out in memory as more difficult than others.
For me, 2005 was one of those years. Within a few months that year, I lost a close friend and my father-in-law to cancer. At the same time, our long-time parish disintegrated, just at the time when we needed spiritual comfort the most.
2019 has also been one of those years.
We dealt with the final months of my mom’s struggle with congestive heart failure and her death in May. Then, there were the many facets of dealing with her death for me and our family, the practical things like funeral arrangements and mounds of paperwork and the personal things, learning to navigate in a world without her.
This year also saw the bittersweet re-location of daughter E and granddaughter ABC to the UK after E’s spousal visa finally came through. We love that they are finally able to live together full-time as a family, but miss having them here on this side of the pond. It was a privilege being here to watch ABC grow from a tiny newborn into a rambunctious, talkative two-year-old. We appreciate being able to visit London in person and to videochat, but it is still a big re-adjustment.
With the losses, celebrating the holidays has been difficult for me. We made lasagna for Christmas using a recipe from Nana and used one of her relish dishes for serving olives. There are ornaments that came from both sides of our family on the tree, as well as some baby’s first Christmas ornaments commemorating ABC’s birth in 2017. We appreciate our memories of Christmas celebrations with Nana and Paco (my parents) and Grandma and Grandpa (B’s parents). I smile thinking about the year that L proposed to E on Christmas morning while visiting here. I remember how, last year, the lower half of our tree was all unbreakable ornaments in deference to ABC who was then 18 months old. Now, there are fragile ornaments scattered throughout all the branches. Christmas this year was very quiet, with just Paco, B, T, and I here for the lasagna and Christmas cookies, which has been our tradition since the years when E and T were young and participating in Christmas morning liturgy for children and families at church. Lasagna was great because you could prep it the night before and bake after church to have dinner at midday.
Of course, all of the personal struggles come at a time of great upheaval, socially and politically, in both the US and the UK. We are all living in a world struggling to deal with present and future climate change and trying to marshall personal and political will to make the changes needed to addresses the causes and effects as best we can.
I know that some people feel a lot of positive energy when we enter a new year and a new decade. I admit that I am not generally one of those people, seeing January first as the day that follows December 31st and not as some shiny new beginning. I don’t know if this change of year will feel different or not. I certainly am feeling the need now to try to take stock and re-arrange the way I use my days, perhaps managing to be more deliberate, now that there are not quite so many factors in my life that require changes of plan and quick reactions to shifting circumstances and priorities.
Perhaps, what I really need is time to rest and take stock, like a sabbatical or a year of Jubilee as it is described in the Hebrew Scriptures. Or maybe not a whole year, but a few months. I will have to ponder…
Sometimes, writing stream of consciousness stays in its own little stories. Today, though, it feels more like travelling.
As we draw close to the beginning of 2020, I wish that the year will take each of you where you most need to go.
*****
Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is “year.” Please join us! Find out how here: https://lindaghill.com/2019/12/27/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-dec-28-19
2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/
I am not big on the magical happenings of a new year, either. Sounds like you had a challenging year. Sending you uplifting thoughts for 2020.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much, Maggie! I wish you all the best in the coming days and months.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I wish the same for you, Joanne!
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
The thought of resting and taking it a bit easier in 2020 sounds like a good plan. I’m sorry the holidays have been difficult for you, so sending virtual hugs and a wish that the coming year gives you peace and happiness.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Mary. I know that I am not alone in struggling with loss over the holidays. Being at peace is a beautiful thought.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s a lot to go through in a year. A sabbatical seems in order. Yet you end with a wonderful wish for us. I’m picturing my winding road.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I wish you a lovely journey on your winding road!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Grief takes a lot of energy and more time than we often realize. Rest well, Joanne. I wish you peace, comfort, and renewed strength when you are ready.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, JoAnna. I know you are speaking from experience. I wish you peace, comfort, and strength, too.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sorry to hear about your loss… as many here have commented, grief is never easy so am sending you lots of huge and new year wishes…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks so much for your well wishes! I hope you have a wonderful 2020!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Your new year’s wish for us to be taken where we need to go is lovely. I grant it back to you in double helpings, even if that means a quiet Jubilee year of needed rest.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much, Ellen! I know 2019 was a fruitful year for you as a writer. Looking forward to hearing about your continuing adventures in 2020!
LikeLike
Sometimes you just have to take it one day at a time. Wishing you and your family all the best in the coming year, my friend. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much, Linda! I know you are a champion of at one day at a time. It’s my father’s favorite thing to say. Best wishes to you and yours for each day of 2020.
LikeLiked by 1 person