I have forced myself to undertake one of my least favorite change-of-year tasks – transferring dates onto the new calendar.
Yes, I still prefer paper calendars. I carry a small one for noting appointments when I am out and about and keep a monthly one near the phone in the dining room. (Yes, I also still prefer to use my landline; only people who may need to reach me at any time have my cell number.)
I need to fill in appointments that are scheduled in 2020 on both the pocketbook calendar and the large calendar. This is tedious, but not especially challenging. What is more poignant for me is filling in birthdays and anniversaries, some of which include the applicable number of years.
Generally, age doesn’t bother me. I’m proud that B and I will celebrate our 38th wedding anniversary this year. Maybe, we will be blessed to reach a 65th anniversary, as my parents, known here as Nana and Paco, did.
Which leads to the poignancy of writing dates on the calendar…
As family members pass away, I make commemoration notes for birthdays and anniversaries on my calendar. This year is the first time that Nana’s birthday and Nana and Paco’s anniversary will be memorials rather than celebrations.
I think that Nana fought hard for a last chance to celebrate Paco’s birthday in March, their 65th anniversary in April, and her 87th birthday in May. She died a few days after her birthday. One of the last things that I helped her eat was a fruit tart that I got as a birthday treat for her from her favorite supermarket bakery.
Changing her dates from celebrations to memorials is just one more small expression of loss, added to so many others.
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It is painful to need to change from a celebration to a memorial. 😦
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Yes. Even though the last few anniversaries and birthdays were, by necessity, low-key, at least we were able to be together.
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Me, too, on paper calendars. I always feel a bit of a Luddite when I pull it out in public to note an appointment. But I can do it a LOT faster than my husband can add a meeting to his iPhone! Like you, I do not look forward to when birthdays no longer mark the day because gifts are not longer bought and mailed for those who have passed on.
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It’s true about the speed and efficiency of paper calendars. I feel the same way about analog clocks, too. I can process the time at a glance of a clock face, but I have to think about the time when I see written out in numbers.
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