On the one hand, I’m worn out by feeling that I can’t make long term plans and that I’m always waiting for the other shoe to drop. There have been so many years of uncertainty both on a personal and a community/national/global level that I would welcome a sense of stability.
On the other hand, it would be terrifying and/or depressing to know that things are going to go badly and that there would be no way to ameliorate or avert them.
So, I guess I will remain in my state of unknowing, making plans, then modifying or dropping them when the next unexpected thing occurs.
I’m trying to be a good national and global citizen and keep up with the news, but things just seem more and more unmoored.
It’s not as though I haven’t felt this way, albeit to a lesser degree, before; it just feels now that there is no certainty left anywhere.
I heard someone say recently that people who are living with the stress of uncertainty just want to know what is going to happen.
Of course, this is impossible.
Because the international climate strike is coming in a few days, on September 20th, perhaps I can muster a little comfort in the energy and resilience of youth committed to positive change in the world. The world’s youth are proving that they are not only the planet’s future but also its present. They are rallying people of all ages to their cause.
I sincerely wish I could be an active participant in the events being held around the world that day, but there are no events in my immediate area. It would be great to travel a few hours to New York City, where the largest gathering is likely to be, in recognition of the UN climate summit which begins soon after the strike. However, an all-day event with hundreds of thousands of people is an impossibility for me. People who have a school or workplace can show solidarity by walking out, but I don’t have either of those.
I will try to do some advocacy work that day and follow the coverage of the NYC event. I can, at least, take a moment to recognize the work I have done both as an advocate and as a consumer over the last several years to bring attention to climate change and try to reduce my own environmental impact.
And re-commit to working in a positive way, moving forward through uncertainty.